Calligraphy Above My Computer

After several years of exiling myself to my upstairs office to use my computer, I bought a laptop & wireless to put on a small desk in the family room. Now I can work downstairs while my wife is nearby - as she is right now, ironing.

On the wall above my desk are two framed calligraphies that give me some peace when I look at them.

The first is a beautiful oriental picture of a low mountain peak, surrounded by forest, with a small man standing near the top, facing out. The calligraphy reads, "Heaven is my father and earth is my mother and even such a small creature as I find a place in their midst. Therefore that which fills the universe I regard as my body and that which directs the universe I consider as my nature." Chang Tsai, 1020-1077.

The second has a vague blue-tinged background, somewhat like the thin clouds that sometimes obscure the view from a plane window. Hidden in the clouds and barely readable are 11 last names of families that had my wife as their faithful deacon for three years. The calligraphy overwriting the cloud background reads "It is a good thing to give THANKS unto the Lord and to sing praises unto your name, O Most High: To show your lovingkindness in the morning and your faithfulness every night." Psalm 92, 1-2.

God is a mystery, for sure. But for me, a comforting mystery that I have faith will someday be revealed, to my great amazement. To me, death is a doorway, not a black hole, and I will step through it with courage.

Bicycle Races - The Good and the Bad

Europeans have long been enamored of bicyle races, chief among them the Tour de France, but bicycle racing is only in its infancy here in the states. Yesterday, I attended a series of races called the Rochester Criterium, which were held on a one-mile irregular circuit around downtown Rochester.

About 30,000 people showed up to view the spectacle which included four different races and lasted 6.5 hours. The afternoon races were for licensed amateurs, and the evening races were for women and men professionals. Around and around they went, flashing down the straights at up to 45 miles per hour, then slowing to a crazy fast pace to weave around the corners. Just as in the Tour de France, there was a pack and there were breakaways from time to time. The athletes, especially the professionals, were lean as greyhounds and pumped their pedals like brightly colored machines riding on top of machines. Interesting.

I attended the Criterium because my oldest son, now in his mid-forties, has become a bicycle nut. He trains and he races at the lowest level, but he's become engrossed in the fine points of bicycles, training, and racing strategy. Like any sport, cycling has complexities that boggle (or bore)the average person, and now I'm familiar with a few of them. But Kevin was in heaven as the various levels of racers went by us, so fast that they were a blur in my vision. Fortunately there was only one crash, and the fellow walked away with only abrasions, bruises, loose teeth, and $1,500 in damage to his bike. (One piece of trivia is that these carbon fiber bikes can cost up to $20,000.)

So, to sum up. Bicycle racing on a closed course resembles a rock concert with loud music and constant announcing - bring earplugs. The athletes are as conditioned as any I've ever seen, and the skill and strategy is apparent even to the uninitiated. The only downside is that most riding is done in tight packs, since "drafting" reduces effort by about 30% - anyone who takes off on his own is nuts. Hence, the race is won or lost in the last, final sprint as riders break from the pack and race pell-mell to the finish. It's all decided in a few long heartbeats, even though the race may have lasted two hours. Somehow this leaves me unfulfilled; it is much different than watching the drama of a two-hour marathon where individuals struggle and triumph or fade on their own in plain sight. But cycling is a different sport.

No, I didn't take my bike off the rack and take a little spin today. I'm saving my energy for the golf course, where I walk and incidentally, won my first round match play match on Thursday morning. Hooray! Old competitors never die.

Doing the Sunday Sermon

It's almost summer, and now is the time when preachers, finished with Easter and Pentecost and Sunday School teacher recognition, decide to take off a week. As they say, "When the cat's away, the mice will play." In the case of this mouse, that means I got to preach a sermon at someone else's church - a Methodist Church , no less! And this Sunday there will be an encore at my own church, since our minister is on vacation as well.

The Methodist invite was a "reciprocal". Our pastor took off the first Sunday of the year, January 7th, and after striking out with many potential substitutes, we chose to ask a friend of mine who is a "Certified Methodist Lay Preacher". He did a good job. Now his pastor took a day off, and payback time arrived. I don't have the official credential - just a lifetime of study and contemplation - and I've preached maybe ten sermons before this one. Not a very scary thing for me, and the response of the Methodists was positive. In fact, there was a Baptist minister in attendance (another preacher on vacation) and he gave me the "thumbs up."

I follow two rules when I preach: keep it simple, and keep it short. I remember that the Gettysburg Address took about two minutes for Abe Lincoln - and I'm no Abe Lincoln. So my sermon is titled "Simple Christianity", and it lasted 15 minutes. The text comes from the end of Matthew 22, where Jesus is asked "What is the greatest commandment?" Jesus answers (in short), "Love God, and your neighbor as yourself". Can't go wrong with this one!

Here is the conclusion of my sermon. "I’d like to conclude this morning by reminding myself and each of you that God has given us the freedom to choose – to choose to notice Him or ignore Him, to choose whether we will love our neighbor or only ourselves. God is right here and everywhere, in every moment, hidden in plain sight, waiting for us to take notice. Let’s choose to notice Him, to say “Thank you, God” all through the day. When we do, the Spirit will fill us, Jesus will walk beside us, and we will be joyful when we meet a neighbor who needs us. We will be a Simple Christian."

I've been studying religion my whole life, only to decide that most of what passes for religion is either legalistic speculation, organization/tradition justification, or money-grubbing avarice. Garry Wills, in his excellent book "What Jesus Meant", resonates with me when he writes:

"The most striking, resented, and dangerous of Jesus' activities was his opposition to religion as that was understood in his time. This is what led to his death. Religion killed him. He opposed all formalisms in worship - ritual purifications, sacrifice, external prayer and fasting norms, the Sabbath and eating codes, priesthoods, the Temple, and the rules of Sadducees, Pharisees, and Scribes. He called authentic only the religion of the heart, the inner purity and union with the Father that he had achieved and was able to share with his followers."

In the end, it seems to me that a person either believes in a creative and benevolent god who wishes to be noticed by creation - or in no opinion, no god or some flavor of that. I believe, simply because my senses tell me that my life and the universe around me is no accident. And people like Jesus and so many others have illuminated this idea far better than I, while rejecting the man-made baloney that masquerades as God-centered while actually being all about power.

Rodney King asked "Why can't we all just get along?" Well, we would if we truly could "Love God, and our neighbor as ourself". Some of my favorite blogger friends seem to be trying to live in this way! Thank you, God, for them.

Bush Should be Impeached

Today I came across a letter of mine to the editor of Rochester's Times-Union newspaper dated July 21, 2003, four months after the March 19, 2003, invasion of Iraq. It was titled "Find Weapons Soon or Investigate Leaders". I had reluctantly support the invasion, convinced by Colin Powell - the only one in the government that I trusted - that Iraq was a real threat to the world. But by July, it was becoming evident that our government probably lied to us. Hence, I wrote this letter.

"As one who was convinced by the president of the United States, and his staff, that war with Iraq was necessary due to the "immanent threat" posed by Saddam Hussein's weapons of mass destruction, I am deeply concerned by the failure of our forces to find these weapons.

The absence of these weapons, if confirmed, invalidates President Bush's rationale for starting this war. The international standing of the United States will be substantially diminished if they are not found, and the cost to the United States in lives lost and billions spent will be judged not to be worth the benefits to our country's security or national interest.

It is therefore essential that these weapons, if they exist, be found. The overthrow of Saddam Hussein, as despicable as he is, does not in itself justify our invasion of Iraq.

Our government must prove that Iraq posed an "immanent threat." If the weapons of mass destruction are not found in the near future, the American people's trust will have been violated.

At that point, an investigation should be initiated by congress to determine why our leaders led us into a war that should not have been fought."

We did not find the weapons of mass destruction. Our government lied to us. "Poor intelligence" is no excuse for what they did, because the president is in charge of intelligence and responsible for the errors. The cost to our country in international standing, lives, and money has been horrific and and will persist for many years.

If there has ever been, in the history of our country, an open and shut case for impeachment of a president, the lies leading to the invasion of Iraq is it. They should not be talking about building the "Bush Library". They should be talking about building the Bush Memorial Prison, where he and Cheney, Powell, Tenet, and Rice should spend most of their remaining lives considering their crimes against the United States.

If the democrats win total control of congress in 2008, the first order of business should be to put all these people on trial. The world must know that we are ashamed of what we did.

My Mommy Trip

It's a beautiful day in Hendersonville, North Carolina. The flag is rippling gently in the wind, the sky is a deep hazy blue, and the overnight guests are trooping in and out of the Comfort Inn breakfast area, past the park bench where I sit writing my blog. I've begun another "Mommy Trip".

My mom is 86 and in great health, pretty and active. She and her 81 year old fourth husband (three have died) live in a single family home nestled in a retirement community that makes life pretty easy for them. She's busy taking care of her husband, painting pretty good watercolors (she's paints "people" very well), volunteering a bit, reading quality fiction, and staying in touch with her five children and their families. She has a good life that's likely to go on for quite a while. Yesterday she chatted with a 107 year old woman as one of her volunteer activities, and she thinks that person is old!

My primary purpose here is to get her husband on the golf course for five straight days so she can paint in peace. He's a golfaholic, and he thinks I'm his coach, which is probably right since he plays much better when I talk him through his shots. Nothing makes him happier than to put nice drive down the middle or get a par. I've had to convince him it's time to use the "senior" tees in order to make the course fair for a person of his age, and now he feels competitive again.

Soon I will leave for their home in order to accompany them to church. Then, after a quick lunch and a change of clothes, we'll head off to play nine holes. Later comes happy hour, then a quiet dinner, and I'll return to the Comfort Inn which seems more and more like home after many trips down here from Rochester. This is a relaxing time for me, a time when my overloaded life goes on hold for a few days.

My experience is typical of many baby boomers whose parents retired years ago and are now reaping the benefits of their many years of hard work in a booming economy. We watch over them like they once watched over us. We encourage them to stay active, to get their rest, and to monitor their health. We often see them get more inward-oriented as their interest in the world wanes - after all, they know their future here is rather limited. We hope they don't get a chronic condition that makes their last years or months a time of pain and worry.

I'm one generation away from my mom and step-dad, and probably from a life much like theirs. We are the fortunate ones, born into an affuent society at good time in history and insulated from much of the world where poverty and uncertainty reign. The big question is, did we use our good fortune wisely enough for posterity? Will our grandchildren and the grandchildren of others all around the world say that our generations built the future, or will they complain that we squandered their inheritance in wasteful, self-indulgent living?

Energy Bonanza, Not Crisis!

I mentioned in my last post that I'm reading Kim Stanley Robinson's "60 Days and Counting". It's about a fellow who is deeply involved in the U.S. government's attempt to counter the global climate change created by our excessive use of fossil fuels since the industrial revolution. Robinson is clearly a Renaissance Man who understands science, politics, human nature and the craft of writing, and it's a pleasure to turn the pages.

One of Robinson's points of view is that the oil interests have little incentive to promote alternative energy sources. He notes that oil, even at current high prices, appears to be a highly economical source of energy. Yet this apparent efficiency does not include the costs of mitigating the climate change effects of burning it, nor does it include the political costs of defending or maintaining its sources.

If burning oil raises the sea level by just one or two meters, the cost of lost property will be measured in the trillions of dollars. If we look at the cost of the Iraq war, we get a sense of how much money we spend to ensure influence over the oil producing countries in the Middle East. When these costs are added to the $3.00 or more we pay for a gallon of gasoline, the economy of oil decreases dramatically. However, the oil industry is indifferent to these externalities because the costs never hit its bottom line and its profits are addictively high. Those involved in it can't help but look the other way as their bank balances skyrocket.

This logic helps explain why our government is doing so little to promote alternative energy sources and energy conservation. It's been a mystery to me that, since 1979 when Jimmy Carter raised the alert about oil import risks, our government has not flexed its immense technological and political muscle to deal with the problem. Even today the action comes nowhere near the level of tepid rhetoric emanating from the White House. There is just too much money involved in maintaining the status quo. We should probably be amending Eisenhower's famous warning about the "military-industrial complex" by adding "fossil fuel" to it.

I have to admit that I've made quite a lot of money this year by investing in several U.S. coal mining companies. My economics background tells me that if I hadn't made that coin, someone else would have. Now I'm looking to invest some of those profits in companies that will hopefully make fossil fuel much less important to our economy, but it may be too late for us to avoid tragic outcomes due to climate changes already too far down the road to halt.

One investment sector that Robinson's novel would lead you to avoid is insurance companies, especially reinsurance companies. If climate change comes on with a vengeance, those companies will be wiped out unless they re-write their coverage to exclude their biggest risks. If they can do this, it's the coastal property holders who will see their investments melt like the arctic ice cap. Not a pleasant scenario either way, is it?

Reducing Me to Eight

I've been going through a dry spell lately. Personally, good things have been happening so it's not been my mood. However, I'm damn fed up with the war and just about everything about the Bush mal-administration makes me want to throw up - and I'm sick of writing about it. So I'm going to follow my friends RWorld and ThomasLB and do the eight things.

1. I've smoked cigarettes for 40 of the past 45 years, and I still do.
2. Last week I did 25 perfect military push-ups on a dare at the ambulance base.
3. My oldest son's birth certificate says that I was 16 years old and a university student when he was born. That's because I adopted him when he was seven and I was 23 and in school after the Army. Tennessee has some strange adoption conventions.
4. I sucessfully managed a very large systems organization without being able to write a single line of code.
5. I'm currently reading "Sixty Days and Counting", by Kim Stanley Robinson, who I really enjoy and heartily recommend to my readers.
6. Years ago I put a loaded shotgun into my mouth and my finger on the trigger. Then I thought about it for awhile and put it down. I became a different person.
7. One reason I believe in a God is that I think life would be pointless without one.
8. I've been there at the death of about 35 people in my ambulance work, so I have no illusions of immortality and I treasure every day.

That's all, folks!

The Democrats Played Their Cards Right

Much as I wish we were starting a strategic withdrawal from Iraq, I still believe the democrats in congress played their hand correctly in the recent vote. They are neither cowardly or stupid, they are simply pragmatic. Bush got a few more months of rope to hang himself with, the democrat leadership (Clinton, Obama, and Pelosi) got symbolic votes in opposition, and the clock will continue to run.

If there had been just enough republican support to stop the funding, Bush and Co. would have had a free hand to screw up the extrication to the extent that a worst case scenario was bound to result. At the same time, the diehard republican base, now wilting, would have been re-energized in opposition. Stories of how our troops are enduring hardships and dying as a result of the funding cut-off would start coming out regularly. Polls show that many Americans, even some of those who oppose the war, are very sensitive to the troops and don't want them hung out to dry. The democrats could have won the cut-off vote and set up their defeat in 2008 at the same time.

The republicans got us into this war, and they will have to get us out. By the fall of this year the futility of continuing will become apparent to many more citizens, and the republicans in congress will follow their instincts. They will force Bush into a significant cutback in the force by early next year. Iraq will be in the same chaos it is in now, or worse. Americans will look at this outcome and be constantly reminded that republicans spent $1 trillion accomplishing nothing much. The democrats will win the presidency in 2008 and get larger majorities in both houses of congress. They will look back at this vote and say "We played our cards right."

Let Bush Fail on His Own Terms

It seems like President Bush is speaking at a military facility just about every other day at this graduation time of year. Yesterday it was the Coast Guard Academy, I believe. The venue may change from friendly place to friendly place, but the message never changes: "We've got to fight them there or they'll follow us to our homes", and "Your children are at risk!". Meanwhile, the surge goes on, lots of GI's and Iraqi's are killed each week, and the Iraqi government sits on its hands. What to do?

I say, let him go. He's veto-proof in congress and he's committed to his stupid strategy and dumb-ass explanations for why we're still in Iraq. We've already spent a fortune on this misguided adventure, so what's a little more to prove it was a dumb idea beyond a shadow of a doubt? September will be here before we know it, and nothing will have changed. At that point even the republicans in congress will be looking for a way out and trying to figure out how to explain three years of unqualified support for this nitwit. Then we get out for good and leave Iraq to the Iraqi's. Hundreds more GI's will die or be seriously wounded while all this plays out, but there's no way to avoid it.

In my view a democrat cut-off of war funding would be foolish at this point. It would give Bush and all the republicans the "out" they so desperately need. So, let them fail on their own terms, then pick up the pieces and go on. The neocons need to be shelved for a long time, and this may just be the best way to make that happen.

Onward, George! The lemmings are still behind you! Don't worry about that cliff called September, "Plan J" will certainly make you the hero you've dreamed of for so long...

"Donorcycles"

Our local Rochester paper reported two more motorcycle fatalities this morning. A 34 year old man lost control on a curve and slammed into a parked pickup truck. A 50 year old woman lost control on a curve, hit a guardrail, and was thrown from her motorcycle. It's a routine story these days. That's why the emergency room staffs call motorcycles "donorcycles".

I've owned three motorcycles and put quite a few miles on them. For many years I commuted to work in good weather on my Silver Wing, sharing the four-lane with cars and trying to stay out of their way. I was fortunate enough to only put my bike down three times, twice when I erred in judging the road surface or the behavior of other drivers and once when I was hit from the rear by a truck while I waited at a yield sign. I was lucky - no broken bones.

There's no question that riding a motorcycle is one of the great "highs" that one can experience. The feelings of power, control, and freedom are unmatched by almost any other activity. To be "one" with your motorcycle is to extend your own mobility by a factor of 100. As one becomes more skilled in guiding the bike, every curve becomes a challenge to overcome with just the right amount of entry speed, lean, and power out. Even a ride to the grocery becomes an experience to be savored, and there is joy in hearing the high-revving motor start up at the turn of a key. If only there was less danger...

I've stopped riding my motorcyles because the risks are too great. As an EMT I've been on the scene of crashes where cyclists, driving safely, were not seen by automobile drivers. They had no time to react and avoid the crashes which left them severely injured. But for luck, I could have been them. So I've decided to forego the thrills of motorcycling in order to avoid being a potential organ donor.

If you're a motorcyclist or thinking of becoming one, weigh the risks carefully. According to government statistics, your risk of death on a motorcycle versus a car, per mile traveled, is 18 times higher. You can lower your risk by wearing a protective helmet and clothing, and by driving well within your limits, but you can't control other drivers or make them see you, and you can't rule out the possibility that you will make one fatal mistake in judgment. If you have significant family responsibilities, the cost of your mistake will be multiplied.

I'm all for organ transplants, so if you ride a "donorcycle", make sure that you've checked the box on your license that gives your approval to be an organ donor. Drive safely, and good luck!

The End of an Adventure

About 3:30 this afternoon I pulled into my driveway. On Thursday, Friday, and Saturday I had hiked 45 miles of the Appalachian Trail in New Jersey and New York. This time, for the first and final time, the trail won. I left home looking forward to a rather benign section of 235 miles over 16 days, but I left the trail exhausted, conquered in three days by seemingly endless steep, rocky mountains. Terrain like that (above right), and much steeper, just kept coming until I had no more to give. Mother Nature had her victory over this 62 year old who still thought he could hang in there with the kids. But no hard feelings, Mother. I respect you.

So ends the long trek that started on top of Springer Mountain, Georgia, on March 20, 1999. Through snow in the high mountains of Georgia and North Carolina, through the wilderness of Southern Virginia where I once got lost, through a night where I sat out a hurricane on a mountaintop near Richmond, through close encounters with a copperhead and a timber rattler, it ends in New York where my last view was that of the Hudson river near West Point. I finished over 90 days and 1,400 miles of hiking, but came up almost 800 miles short of my goal in Maine. So now I join the huge throng who shared that objective and were outlasted by Mother. But it was a good run, and my regrets are few.

If you ever meet anyone who has hiked the entire Appalachian Trail, you should know that that person has world class fortitude. Both physically and mentally it is one of the more difficult challenges one could accept. My hat is off to all of the approximately 10,000 people who have accomplished the feat since 1934.

Perhaps it's time to take up cycling, and, of course, continue my blog. Life goes on.

On the Trail Again!

I've enjoyed reading my blogger friend's posts this past week while I spent most of my time playing with my children and grandchildren. And since getting home three days ago I've been frantically completing my three sets of non-profit financial statements and getting my pack organized for my next foray on the Appalachian Trail which begins today.

It will take me 15 days to walk from Vernon, NJ, to North Adams, MA, which is about 235 miles. That is, unless I do something stupid or a Hurricane comes roaring up the eastern seaboard. Perhaps there will be a library computer along the way, so I may be able to post while I walk, walk, walk. Once at my destination I will have only two more May hikes before I reach Mount Katadin in northern Maine and finally get to stop this nonsense after 2,180 miles.

Meanwhile, back in Washington, Trent Lott is talking about "progress needs to be made before September or we'll have to talk about Plan B". Come on, Senator Lott. How about "Plan H"? I feel so bad for the soldiers who are now being mobilized to continue the insanity in Iraq. President Bush is a sad character, but I can't feel sorry for him when he's killing people in a hapless foray to save a lost cause.

Keep up the good work, fellow bloggers! I look forward to catching up with you upon my return from the forest.

Consequences

While the Bush White House and the Democratic-controlled congress wrangled over funding the Iraq war, the Republican candidates for president in 2008 debated their various positions on the issues, including the war. Not surprisingly, none of them condemned the initiation of the war by Bush in 2003 and none of them called for the party's rejection of Bush, Cheney, Rice and the others who kicked off the debacle that will cost perhaps a trillion dollars and 4,000 lives, and leave an Iraq in chaos. Their stance seems to be, "We are where we are and there's no need to talk about how we got here." I disagree. There must be consequences for one of the most monumental screw-ups in American history.

At this point it looks like the Bush administration will walk away in early 2009, leaving their mess behind them as they look forward to reaping the benefits of their long service in office. The current congress will continue to pester them and make their lives unpleasant for the next two years, but they will continue their costly occupation of Iraq and be unable to make any progress on the major internal problems that they once promised to solve. Historians will be dissecting their many failures for decades to come, but they will be comfortable in retirement. Who, then, must bear the consequences? The only officials left to punish are those who supported the Bush war and who wish to remain in office after the next election. They must go.

It would be wonderful if the Democrats fielded strong candidates for 2008 for both the executive and legislative openings, but the election will be only partly about them. It must be an election of repudiation, an election where Republicans are swept out by an electorate that demands consequences for failure. The Republican-controlled congress, who acted as cheerleaders for the Bush administration's policies instead of fulfilling their oversight role, must bear the consequences for the disasters that occurred on their sleepy-headed watch.

The 2008 election largely will not be about issues going forward. It will be about the performance and accountability of those previously in power, and about the role the current presidential candidates played in supporting or not supporting the Bush administration. If these men believe that, somehow, they will be able to divert attention away from their votes and statements in support of Bush's decisions, they are mistaken. Democratic candidates will be airing commercials that "star" them making these votes and statements. It's no wonder that frank discussion of the Bush presidency was missing from their recent debate, but the hot lights of truth will soon be upon them. "Conseqences" will follow.

A Pre-retirement Present - You're Downsized!

As you may know, I'm one of the lucky ones who was able to tell their corporation "goodbye" because I was tired of the BS. I loved my job, but my boss changed and all of the sudden I started getting a lot of "direction" that I had somehow been able to succeed without for many years. When my new boss called and asked me "How many of your people have volunteered" to take the latest voluntary reduction in force package, I said "I may take it." He said, "You can't do that!" I said, "I meet the requirements and I'm gone." Best day of my life.

Today I'm visiting my children in Phoenix, and I'm glad to be with my 8-month granddaugher. She's always happy - wakes up with a smile on her face. My two sons are doing fine. One is a music therapist who works with autistic children, and the other teaches 8th grade math in the "combat zone", a largely Hispanic area with lots of crime. The first son came here as a top salesman for a Fortune 100 company, the second has been a banker and a successful head-hunter. Now they work at jobs that they love and don't have to read 50 emails every day.

But today our visit was saddened by the news that the other grandfather, a man my age, was "downsized" from a bank one year before he would qualify for retirement and medical benefits. This news came one week after he received a "superior" performance report, and he had recently been awarded a nice trip for outstanding work. The reason given was that his job was redundant due to a consolidation, so he had to re-apply for it. It seems strange that such a "superior" performer would not be chosen to fill his current position, but such is life in the brutal world of U.S. corporations. I'm pissed. He did not deserve this shabby, life-changing treatment after doing his best and exceeding the requirements of his (actually, not "his") job.

Ten years ago when I was managing a large staff, my boss and I conspired to keep older workers on the payroll until they qualified for benefits they had spend years working toward. I remember walking into one fellow's office and saying "______, you're fired!" His response was, "Thank you very much!" In those days some people, at least, knew that individuals were due respect for the contributions made over years of following the direction of corporate masters. But times have changed.

To all who are working for a large corporation: don't ever forget that you work for "you". When you get your paycheck, remember that you and the corporation are "even". They will not hesitate to kiss you goodbye when it suits their purposes. You should be equally ready to kiss them goodbye. Keep your eyes open for positions that suit your skills and reward you better. Act like an entrepreneur even if your skills best fit a corporate life. Never for a moment consider the effect of your departure on a current employer or the tasks you are involved in, because that large employer won't consider the effect on you of their decision to toss you on the scrap heap for a reason you will never understand. That's the way it is in the new economy.

Good luck, grandfather! Don't look back unless you have a good case for an age discrimination suit. Bitterness, which initially tastes so sweet, will eat you up. Just go out and do what you have to do, even though you don't deserve to be in this position. Let me swear at the bastards that did this to you, and try to work for more humane work laws in this brutal country.